We live in clichés. We think in them, we talk in them, and we often write in them without even realising it. They’re the ready-made furniture of the mind, comfortable to sit on but prone to sag. Sometimes the only way to shake them off is to lean all the way in, roll around in them, and get it out of your system. So consider this a cathartic purge, an unapologetic wallow in the most threadbare phrases imaginable to explain why the editor of St Francis Today is taking about ten days off.

“The time has come. You can’t burn the candle at both ends forever. The well has run dry, the tank is empty, the batteries are flat, and the wheels are coming off. The treadmill keeps turning, the hamster keeps running, but eventually, even the hamster needs a nap. He’s been spinning plates, juggling chainsaws, and trying to herd cats while putting out fires in a leaky boat. The daily grind has become the daily grindstone, and the axe is well and truly dull.

Empty Cup

At the end of the day, you can’t pour from an empty cup. You can only kick the can so far down the road before you trip over it. And while Rome wasn’t built in a day, it also won’t collapse just because the editor takes ten. The show will go on, the sun will rise, the tides will turn, and the inbox will still be overflowing when he gets back.

So yes—the curtain has fallen, the typewriter is silent, and the newsroom lights are dimmed. He’s put the pen down and picked up his board and wetsuit. It’s not goodbye, just a pit stop, an extended surf session, a chance to catch his breath, sharpen the saw, and come back guns blazing.

Elvis has left the building.”

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Subject: Out of Office – Editorial Desk

From: The Editor
To: Valued Reader

Out of Office Auto-Reply

Thank you for your enquiry. The editor is currently unavailable. He will be away for ten days, finding himself.

Please note: all messages sent during this period will be ignored with the utmost professionalism. Any replies received before his return are purely accidental.

For editorial enquiries, please email:
lastseenattheanneavenuegroyne@yahoo.biz.404.com.au

Confidentiality Disclaimer:
This email may contain clichés, sarcasm, or editorial burnout. If you are not the intended recipient, please delete immediately and go for a swim. St Francis Today accepts no responsibility for sudden bouts of sunshine.